It’s pretty much as hard as you dread. I’ve cried maybe 3 times in my adult life (outside of the times I’ve drank a little too much and got emotional) and this one was by far the worst (and one of the others was also about the dog). I cried for a week leading up to it as she deteriorated and I had to make the choice, again the day of, and again the days after every time I was reminded of her, especially when I went to bed.

I got her with an ex, but for several years now I’ve been single and living alone with just my cat and dog. I also work from home and most of my hobbies are at home. So, literally, everything I do every day the dog was involved in. Wake up, let the dog out. Bring in a package or food, dogs sniffing it. I leave and come home, the dogs greeting me. Move from room to room, I’m checking where my pets are. Take a vacation, gotta make arrangements for the pets. Move slightly on the couch or, heaven forbid get up, the dogs checking what I’m doing. She used to lay outside the shower when I was showering. Making food, leaving the house for more than a couple hours, sleeping, eating, working, literally everything involved at least thinking about the dog briefly.

But I guess that’s the price for having that companion for the last 11 years.