So tired of the loss, the struggle, the loneliness, the always giving, never getting. I’m so very, very tired.
Family members always asking for me to do something for them but never lift a finger to help. Work putting me through hell but no compensation. Giving my all to work and family with no help in return.
I always thought making my hobbies more interesting would make people be interested in me but all I get is “Oh cool…anyways-” when I show them the video game I made. When I tell them the book I wrote. When I show them a painting I made. I get ghosted when I try to talk to people I meet. They say the only way to cure loneliness is by yourself but that’s a load of bullshit. I can only say I have one friend who I sometimes play games with and talk over discord. I’ve met people but I’m always to initiate conversation, to invite them to do something. Recently, I’ve met people who seemed interested in the work I do and requested my contact info. But yet, my messages remain empty.
I hear of people I know in my life traveling, winning big amounts of money, getting married, having kids, getting promoted. Me? A virgin with a bachelor’s, in their 30s, living with their parents, stuck in a job for 2 years that still considers me a trainee, and posting a vent online because no one in my life gives a shit about how I’m feeling.
I’m so very tired, boss.
I would add, that it sounds like you just want to have someone look at your works. You also might be looking in the wrong places for friends. Join clubs of your interests; the average person isn’t going to give a shit about painting unless it’s their drywall. Also the age group we’re in, at least from my experience are as you wrote getting married and having kids; they may have looked at your game or read your book when they were younger, but as of today, you have to realize that their struggles are different than yours. It’s easy to forget something when you have a toddler, a job, a house to take care of, family related events, a spouse. I’ll tell you some of my friends simply don’t have the time to have a chat. Despite being single, I understand them, and I don’t want to even have a relationship let alone kids. Even for me, you thought you’re going to have a day off? Surprise your washing machines internal hose broke and there’s water everywhere so now you get to clean that mess, order parts, and fix it! Yay.