Beneath a shady tree, the hero spread
His table on the turf, with cakes of bread;
And, with his chiefs, on forest fruits he fed.
They sate; and, (not without the god’s command,)
Their homely fare dispatch’d, the hungry band
Invade their trenchers next, and soon devour,
To mend the scanty meal, their cakes of flour.
Ascanius this observ’d, and smiling said:
“See, we devour the plates on which we fed.”
“We ordered a bunch of flatbreads topped with cheese, honey, and fruit for anyone who stays back late tonight.”
“Wait 'til those fucking Persians see what we got planned!”
Also, guys - guys - we don’t have to do everything the greeks did, okay? Like, maybe we just drink the wine as is, and don’t bother watering it down?
“Look at this guy! What next, Mr. Innovator? How about we wear clothes when we exercise? Or maybe throw away our valuable urine?”
“Next thing you know, they’re gonna invite women to the orgies! Preposterous!”
“Hold on! I think Simplexus is on the something here…”
“Uh oh! Errr… chief! Bad news! How to say it… hmm… Now I get why someone was proposing to build the bakery first…”